Monday, March 22, 2010

OMG - I can't believe this has happened!

I woke up this morning at about the regular time. I didn't know why at first, but I was feeling quite anxious. I went through the normal ablutions and dressed. Turned on the morning news (Scarborough - I love to get a good mad-on in the morning) and suddenly it hit me! I knew why I had a pit in my stomach the size of a surgical sponge left behind by an underpaid doctor. Just before falling asleep last night I had heard the news. It was going to change our world as we know it. Things would never be the same. The earth had shifted off its axis, and I'm not talking about the Chile earthquake, that was a small quake compared to this. Congress passed health care and it was going to Obama for his signature.

I didn't know what to do. The sense of dread was all-enveloping. As I paced from room to room I tried to imagine what my life would be like now. Death Panels! I asked aloud to the empty room how something like this could happen in America. America! Socialism! Should I move? Where to? Will I still be allowed to move? I heard some are going to Costa Rica. Where is Costa Rica? They must have great health care. Note to self: find out where Costa Rica is.

I began to feel suddenly ill. Oh no. I can't get sick now! I should pray. Yeah, that's what I decided to do. I would pray that I never get sick and that I can find Costa Rica. Maybe I'll just die suddenly. That won't be so bad. Then I began to feel a sore throat starting. No!

And then it happened. Without any warning! One second to the next. As I faced the window, dish towel twisted between my hands so tight I could feel the circulation getting cut off, the sun came up. Oh glorious golden sun with rays of warmth stroking my face. And then I knew without any doubt that everything was going to be all right. (I did throw up once or twice but that was from relief and not even worth mentioning. Oh, well, never mind.) Congress passed health care last night and this morning the sun still came up. And now I really believe that it will go down again tonight and rise again tomorrow. I went to work and drank coffee and took my breaks, went to lunch, had more breaks and drank more coffee. It was just like last week and the week before that. Maybe all those terrifying predictions won't come to pass. Maybe everything will be all right.

Now, where is my world map? Costa Rica?

Check out another great column from Paul Krugman.